When it comes to broken homes, everyone pays a terrible price, especially the children. The short and long-term effects are brutal on the children. The scars outlive the broken promises and broken dreams. There are over fifteen million children in fatherless homes, however, I don’t want to fill this article with statistics. I do want to speak from my experience working with single parents.
The reason behind a broken home or the status of divorced or unmarried relationships does not matter. The remaining parent must try to keep a roof over the kid’s heads and food in their stomachs, heat, and utilities, etc. That is an exhausting job for any parent without parenting alone. Usually one of the first things that lack is parental supervision. A single parent working long hours or even two to three jobs is not at home supervising schoolwork, friendships, activities, or online interactions and limiting time on social media.
Children are very savvy today. With media and TV shows they know age-inappropriate things that should remain “adults only.” They are also very sensitive and emotional. Children know what’s going on in the house and will react in many different ways. They are easily at risk for bad outcomes in life. Let’s look at what can happen if the children don’t get the help that they need at the crucial stages. In some cities, if the child doesn’t feel loved and supported at home, they will be prime targets for gangs who will promise them that they will be part of a family, a gang where they will have security. Once in, the ends are the stuff of nightmares and bad statistics.
Counselors confirm that children from a broken home can feel very needy and insecure. These children become easy targets for the human sharks that are looking to exploit them.
Even without anyone exploiting them, many will still find drugs, alcohol, and addiction to deal with stress, abandonment, and dysfunction, even simple peer pressure or boredom.
Many children will blame themselves when a mother and father part ways. They think they are bad, not good enough, or feel they don’t measure up. One of the saddest things I have ever encountered was a child questioning her worth because her father would not willingly pay his child support. She thought this was proof she wasn’t worth loving by him.
Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. This is a fact, a reality.
It is also a reality that this does not have to affect your children negatively. Rebecca C. an LMH counselor in Florida reports that she has several clients who “have given up trying to collect past due child support because the abuse from the system was not worth it.”
But your kids are worth it. And fighting for what is due for you and them is fighting for them, fighting for a better outcome and a better future for you both.
Who’s helping the kids?
You are, by fighting for what they deserve. If all this is too much for you, remember we are here to help.