I hate to be the one to tell you this but; the CSE agencies don’t always tell you the truth. I don’t mean to imply that they purposely provide you with incorrect and misleading information but that due to a myriad of reasons – lack of proper training, lack of proper time to do their jobs, lack of understanding their clients’ needs – it happens more than it should.
The CSE agencies frequently give moms information that is wrong. Many times the misinformation is based on the opinion of the worker that provided the information and culture of the office environment, not on fact or law. They may tell you that “all they can do” is to file a contempt of court motion, suspend the non-payors license, etc., when in fact there are many other options that they never mention that they could do, if they were so inclined. They don’t tell you because they want to continue to use the same old practices and follow the same old routines that they always use – whether they work or not. They don’t tell you because they don’t want to do the extra work that they would be bringing upon themselves. They don’t tell you maybe they haven’t been properly trained to understand these other methods and how to implement them effectively and there is always the possibility that they are completely clueless about out of the ordinary solutions. Same ol’, same ol’ is what they are comfortable with. I’m sure that they don’t want you to know that there are other possibilities because they don’t want you to insist on using them or asking them why they have been considered in the first place. If you were to bring new solutions to their attention, they might suggest that you do them yourself but they won’t offer you any assistance. The bottom line though is that you should never, ever, believe what they tell you at face value. Question every “no can do” that they offer up.
With the majority of child support collection cases there are always more options. Can you collect from him if he works under the table? Yes. Can you collect from him if he owns a business and puts everything in somebody else’s name? Yes. Can you collect from him if he is on social security or unemployed? Yes and Yes.
So what’s a mom to do?
We are all resourceful women. We figure things out when we need to. We fight for our kids when we have to. My kids have always called me a momma bear. Mess with my kids and it’s game over. I will be all over you and I’m not even sure that there would be a bloody stump left to bury. And if by chance, I lose the fight – you will damn sure know that you have been in one.
Put on your big girl panties and ready yourself for another fight. Your kids have only one chance at a childhood and if dance lessons are on the list, then they should be able to have them. Learn about your options and learn about the laws in your state as they apply to the guidelines. If you have arrears, learn about the different laws that can be applied to collection cases.
You can do this. I am here to help you. You have more resources than you know. The very first thing that you need to do though is to stop right here and right now and question every “no” that a CSE agency has given you. Question every time they told you that they were going to file a contempt motion again and you received no results, again. Most of you have heard this one before but in the slight chance that you haven’t, I am going to repeat it again and it makes perfect sense. Albert Einstein said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. If you believe this, then you have got to believe that CSE is insane for dragging you through the same process over and over and getting nowhere. Just how many times will they file that contempt motion, anyway? And if you believe this quote then you have got to believe that you are participating in the insanity if you continue to allow them to do it. Until now maybe you didn’t know that you had choices and options. Well, you do now. Whether your problem is finding him, finding his income and assets, or collections – you have options. The options you have will depend on the circumstances of your case. This blog post isn’t intended to provide you with your options but you will be able to find them within this blog and website. Rather it is intended to be an eye-opener and a reason for you to question whether there are possibilities for collecting your money which have not been utilized yet or even spoken out loud and then to do something about it.
Did you already know that CSE is not your friend?
What experiences have you had with CSE?
Has your CSE office ever initiated any out of the box solutions for collecting your arrears?
Wishing you the best,
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